Most people are satisfied with a roof over their head and four walls to call their own. It’s a place where you can be warm, dry, that you can decorate to fit who you are, have private interactions, and let all frustration out without anyone seeing you. It’s a nice place to escape from the big bad people in the world. Its somewhere where you feel most relaxed and you can let it all out. Its a place of salvation and redemption. A place where you get to store you most prized processions and keep them locked away from predators who would otherwise call your stuff their stuff. An area to show off your personality and your lifestyle. It’s all in that one four walled area. A space with your name written all over it. You have the keys, you have the control. For most people in the world, just having something to call their own is enough. They live, breath, have interactions, plant roots in those four walls, and make it a place they officially call home. Home becomes a place you can go back to when you leave and go places. Home becomes a place for your fur babies to grow up. Home becomes a place you can start a family and build a career.
For me I have seen the same four walls for years. The window looks out to the grass and fence of my next door neighbor. A place with all of my photos and frames up. A place to display my CD's, Butterflies, awards, Map with all the dots of places I’ve been, and a computer filled with the memories of thousands of pictures to show the past and present. Yet it’s not enough. I go outside my four walls and I get in my car. The engine purrs in response to my call. Once I back out of my garage and start back on this long and winding road I feel a sense of freedom, no matter how short it is. There is no wall to hold me back. There is no memory for me to stare at. There is no constant repetitiveness that makes me sigh and roll my eyes. All of the restraints are gone and I am suddenly alive. My heart beats a little faster, my smile is wide, and my eyes feel like they are shining from deep in my soul, I can breathe in the fresh air and just drive.
Having roots means that you have somewhere you are in charge of for however long you are there. It means that you can’t detach yourself from the place and just go anywhere for as long as you desire. It’s a constant pull that you have to pay attention to. Something you have to keep on the sidelines but not too far in the sidelines that you can’t see it anymore. Roots means that your life is attached to the things that you need to survive. It means that you have to go back eventually. Sure a home is nice to have, roots can be rewarding but, it can also be the biggest pain for those who don’t want that life yet. Mobility is the biggest asset to us humans. It gives us a chance to expand. It gives us experience. It makes us step out of our comfort zone and its exhilarating.
Every time I leave my temporary home to go somewhere new I know that at any time I can make a call and tell my Dad I’m not coming back. I know there are no roots. There’s nothing really holding me down and nothing to stop me from making that decision to just make a 360 and never come home. That’s the thing about the four walls that people don’t realize. it’s wonderful that people want to start a family, have place to call theirs and somewhere to go back to but, if you ever question that life just know that you can make a complete turn around and leave it behind. You may fight with your lover, you might have issues making it real and to do it, you have to let almost everything go but, if you decide to do it...well you may just free yourself from the roots that you planted.
Tread carefully though, because once you do it you may never want to go back to being planted in one spot. For me, the adventure never ends, it just keeps going, twisting and winding my life. Four walls just isn’t enough for me.
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